Thy Will

I think all growing up i wanted to always do what was right, for the most part. (We may have to skip my sassy moments here and there). But when it came down to it I always wanted to get good grades, complete my goals, stay out of trouble...

*

I think i was pretty self-motivated whether it came to practicing the piano, studying for tests, going to seminary, and basically just living the gospel. Of course I wanted to be obedient for the sake of being obedient but i also just knew that it was right and that was what i wanted to do.

*

Then i got married and the whole idea of starting a family came in to play.

*

I must insert here for when my children read this... that i have never regretted any decision what so ever. I love my babies and am so grateful for them. The Lord just has always put more trust in me than i ever put in Him.

*

That being said, when it was time to make the decision to have Kolby i was honestly scared to death. I secretly hoped that it would take me a while to get pregnant so that i could better prepare myself. I got pregnant in 2 months. My world was completely rocked when i became a mother. I had no idea what i was doing and i lacked those "i just love babies" feelings. I felt that i was making a huge sacrafice but that i was willing because it was the Lord's Will.

*

Then i was suprised to find out i was pregnant with Olivia only 12 months later. I had felt even more unprepared and that perhaps I was too stubborn to follow the Lord's Will so it was forced upon me.

*

Every time i listened to General Conference i would get the feeling that my family was still incomplete. I shoved these feelings aside. I prayed to my Heavenly Father, "I feel so comfortable, so content, I finally love being a stay at home mom, i finally think I am doing a good job...why do i always have to be pushed to the breaking point?".

*

Then it dawned on me. If I would just make His Will My Will, everything would be so much easier. If I just did things because i wanted to do what was right, not because i felt forced to, everything would be easier. What if instead of always saying, "Fine, Thy Will be done" I could say "Yes, that is exactly what i was hoping for or yes that is just what i was thinking too". Wouldn't it be grand to be on the same page!

*

I don't know why this realization took me so long to figure out. I think i have trust issues.

*

All of a sudden I really wanted a baby. I experienced what i suppose most women are just born with. I saw little ones and just knew that that was what i wanted.

*

For the first time i totally planned a pregnancy. For the first time, reading that little blue plus sign filled me with complete untainted excitement.

*

For the first time i experienced some problems. One day the doctor told me I wasn't pregnant. The next day they called and said I was. I was an emotional basket case to say the least.

*

I am finally out of the high risk and since i have told some of you, or will see some of you shortly at the big wedding, or since my mother is dying to tell all her friends...

*

I have decided to announce that i am expecting baby #3. Due on May 10.

*

If you actually read all the above congrats you made it to the only interesting part:)

*

I just wanted to document this. Thanks for letting me bore you.

*

Motherhood continues to teach me and forces me to strengthen my faith on a daily basis. I am grateful that the Lord's Will always truly was my Will, even if it took me awhile to figure that out.

P.P. I.

Yesterday Daniel and Kolby had their 1st P.P.I. Kolby was super excited to have his very own special meeting with dad. They met in the study and had a prayer and kolby requested that they sing a song. He also was wondering if the "other guys" (as in the bishopric) were coming. They discussed his strengths, goals (write his name, listen to mommy and daddy, and Daniel's commitment is to help him make a derby car), Kolby got his first allowance, and filled out his 1st tithing slip. Daniel told me that he was explaining to Kolby that he could give the tithing to the Bishop. Kolby then asked if the Bishop gives it to Heavenly Father. So cute! I love my little guy! I am so grateful for this family tradition that has been passed down in the Lawton family and for such a worthy priesthood leader to be teaching our son. Also, in case i forget....a few weeks ago Kolby peeked in to the Bishop's office and saw his ginormous 3-ring binder on his desk. He asked Daniel if they were the Gold plates. hee hee. love that kid!

Curly Sue

Our ward was split a few weeks ago so now we meet at 12:30 instead of 10:00. This gave me some extra play time to get Olivia all dolled up. SHe loved her "princess" hair. Too bad by the time we actually went to church it was completely straight. Sorry baby you have your momma's hair:)

Hey batter batter

Saturday was spent playing a little T-ball in the drive way. Daniel was so excited he went and and bought the stand and a glove for kolbs. Olivia actually preferred cheering kolby at bat but took a couple swings and said "Hiiiiya". Kolby picked up on it pretty fast and was actually getting good. Then Daniel took a turn and nail kolby in the tummy when he was only 3 feet away. The mark was still there when we put him to bed that night. I think we're gonna sign up for T-ball in the spring, and preferrably not have Daniel as the coach.

a grounder to 2nd...

Kolby came up with this all on his own...i think there may be a little Bambino in him afterall.

right in the gut

hey batter batter!

i think its gonna be a good day

last night i went to bed at 11. my hubby didn't come to bed til 1. I had no idea why. This morning i awoke to a clean kitchen, clean guest bathroom and 3 baskets full of folded laundry. i'm pretty sure this kind deed was triggered by a frustration of not having any clean clothes to wear but I will definately take it:) I love the line in Julia and Julie when she says, "I think I have ADD, that's why I can't do housework..." (or something close to that). Sorry hubby for my recent "ADD" Thanks for channeling your frustration at the dirty house instead of at me. I love you! And now i think i can conquer the world! or at least make it to the grocery store:)

Preschool is for big boys

Technically we started preschool last week but since it was at our house and i was teaching i felt like Kolby's 1st official day of preschool was yesterday. He was so excited especially when i told him that i would drop him off and Olivia and I would go back home. He felt like such a big boy. He bragged to Olivia how he had a pbj sandwich in his backpack and that he was going to eat it at preschool. Olivia cried the whole way there that she wanted to go to preschool and that she wanted to eat a pbj sandwich too. Poor baby girl. I told her she had to wait til she was bigger. She told me that she was a big girl! Olivia was trying so hard to be part of everything, even the pic. And when it was time to go pic kolby up she was super excited!

....and thus begins the school days and growing up of my children. Here's the set up at our house last week:

The curriculum came with super cute posters and charts. This is the map and the little helper chart.

Here's the "grocery store" poster, (the kids use play money and follow the poster to buy items for the right price) and our calendar and weather chart on the easel.

Of course i had to empty the library shelves and stock up on rainforest and frog books.

and here is our pet frog "rosie" (since rosie was kind enough to catch him for me) The kids loved being able to pet him and then watch him leap to freedom:) Here's the cuties. I can't help but be sad that Olivia feels so left out. She totally thought she was a part of their gang. Look at her trying to be just like all the big kids.

Launching Kolby's Out of this World Birthday Party

Greetings...

The back drop

Space Station: make your own astronaunt

Refueling Station: complete with Milkyways, Starburts, oh ya and a pic fro NASA not to be confused with a pic of my 1st husband

"Moonwalk":

thanks to my AWESOME friend for letting me borrow two of these babies for free!!! i love you!!!

The Party favors: "planets" The birthday boy!

Singing Happy Birthday...

That alien didn't stand a chance against Olivia

Cheesy grin with our fav neighbors!

oh ya and the coolest present ever!

Our fam from San Antonio made this awesome Monster Truck for Kolbs.

I just need to attach straps and he can wear it for Halloween.

Yes they really are that artistic!

Ta da! The whole gang counting down for daniel to shoot off the 2-liter bottle rockets.

The kids all had a blast and it didn't rain on us! hooray!!! whew!

09/09/09

what a cool day to have a birthday! its so symmetrical:)

Today my baby turned 4! yikes! 4 seems so much older than 3! I no longer have two toddlers, I have a toddler and a kid!

This week has been a little crazy so i was glad when we woke up that Daniel had left a box of sprinkle donuts, a bottle of chocolate milk, and a card for Kolby. I got a little teary reading the card. What a great dad.

Today was spent having our first day of preschool and it was at our house! It was so fun and Kolby was well behaved and he even repeated back all the things he learned to my mom over the phone so apparently he was listening!

This evening we will go get Kolby's fav food, chicken nuggets, and then we will go up to the church as I am in charge of the joint activity.

We will host preschool again on Friday and that evening I will throw him a Space birthday party so we can really celebrate!

Happy Birthday Little Man!

Here's a few of my fav things about you right now:

-you have an amazing memory! you tell us things that happened to you when you were only 18 months! its just crazy! and a wee scary!

-you love to learn! i think heavenly father knew i would need a child who would love to play school with me so that i wouldn't miss teaching:)

-you still take naps! knock on wood! thanks bud!

-you're a great big brother, you like to teach olivia how to do things too.

-you make me laugh everyday, whether its by jumping out and scaring me or making up a silly song, or just saying what's on your mind.

I love you tons and tons! maybe you should stop growing up now...i think this is as old as i can handle. Let's just stay young enough to play preschool and take naps and get chicken nuggets together FOREVER ok? ok.

Camping

We went camping with Mark and Rosie Friday and Saturday and absolutely loved it! They have a pop-up tent so really it was like luxury camping:) The weather was great, the food was yummy (even if my dutch oven chessy chicken Italiano took FOREVER), and the kids had a blast! I love just letting my kids play without having to worry about cleaning my house.

High lights:

-staying up til 2 playing 9s

-the 3 raccoons trying to sneak off with the dog food

-canoing next to 3 visible alligators

-swimming in that same lake

-chocolate covered almonds

-watching mark and daniel attempt to kill the state animal, an armadillo, after its constant taunting to the dog.

-oh yes, and the best part about the weekend? probably these next shots...ya definately

ABCs

Kolby is starting preschool next week with a bunch of friends from church. We are using the MotherGooseTime curriculum which is awesome because we each only paid $13 for materials and lessons from now til December.

I however could not control myself and had to do this cool idea i found online this week even before our "preschool" begins.

We reviewed our letters from last year by reading tons and tons of ABC books. Our fav was Zoopa, which inspired us to eat ABC soup. The kids also ate ABC spaghetti Os but I plugged my nose and fixed myself something else:)

The best activity was our ABC scavenger hunt. We just wrote all the letters on index cards and then I hid the cards around the house next to an object that started with that letter. Ex: D- door, L-lamp...

The kids had a blast and I was so suprised that Olivia even knew the letter M ( on the monkey chair) and the letter E (with the eggs). I guess i don't realize that she is actually listening when i teach kolby all these things.